eran jayne photography » Tsawwassen family photographer

Motherhood: Unfiltered ~ Christine

In an age where social media and technology provide us with constant opportunities to take and retake photos, add filters, edit flaws and present an often unrealistic image of ourselves and our lives as mothers, we set out to create a series of real-life motherhood moments – without the filters, without the edits, but with all the beauty.

This is Christine.

YouTube link

In her words:

My husband and I always wanted a family. After years of trying to get pregnant without success, we decided to pursue adoption. It was a long and difficult process, with several devastating heart breaks along the way. Thankfully, in the end, we found our incredible girls. I marvel at the way that our families connected. I became a mother the moment I saw my eldest daughter’s photography pop up on my computer screen, a bond that only grew when she was placed in my arms six days later by her birth mother.

My daughters have changed me in all the best ways, and I am happier than I ever thought possible. I think this project is wonderful because as mothers there is a lot of criticism and competition between us, which is supported by a social media world that only shows the edited “perfect” moments of our lives. The only thing that should matter is how much we love our children, and that we are all trying to raise good, well-adjusted human beings. Sometimes that means also being exhausted, and cranky, and sad, and lonely, and scared. And we should show that more because it’s the real part of motherhood that makes us human.

On day my girls will be mothers, and I want them to remember all the good times in their childhood and repeat the same traditions we have started with their families, but I also want them to remember that sometimes mommy was sad and overwhelmed and scared. And that the house was dirty and messy and that mom and dad had fights sometimes. But that all that was okay because it was part of motherhood and being a parent.

What is your biggest challenge or concern as a mother?
I worry that my girls will face racism – that they won’t be treated fairly and that the world will judge them because of their skin colour. They are my babies and I want to protect them from being hurt but I know that I can’t shield them from the realities that exist.
How has your experience as a mother shaped the way you experience the world and/or shaped your life?
Becoming a mother has changed me completely. I remember that instant that I looked at my eldest and knew that I would do absolutely anything to keep her safe. I remember feeling really overwhelmed with the huge responsibility of raising another human being. I am so much more deliberate about my choices, and I am so much closer to my husband, my family and my friends because I know cannot raise happy, healthy girls without all of their involvement. Becoming a mother has forced me to see the world through a child’s perspective again, and I am constantly reminded about how magical and beautiful life is.
What makes you a good mother?
I am good at parenting to my girls strengths and talents. My eldest is sensitive, artistic and kind. My youngest is feisty, athletic and funny. I do different things with both of them that play to their abilities and help me build on their unique qualities.
Anything else you’d like us to know?
When I became a mother, another mother gave up her baby. My happiest day was her saddest day, and the enormity of her decision is something I think about every day. My girls have 2 moms. And I am so blessed to have an ongoing relationship with their birth mother, and our girls know all about growing in her tummy and how she took really good care of them until mommy and daddy could come get them. I owe her everything and I will be grateful for the rest of my life for the incredible gifts she gave us.
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